Susan WonderStone's Blog


Thank you King County Sheriff’s Office Deputy!

I’ve been wanting to go hiking at a higher elevation, but my car doesn’t like going over the pass, or even up to it. I try to let things in my environment teach me about myself, remembering when I need to be gentle with my car, I probably also need to be gentle with myself.

One day a couple weeks ago after a meditation, I realized I’ve been feeling stupid for a solid year, angry with myself for not realizing my breast implants were causing such huge problems with my health. Regardless of the fact that none of my doctors ever mentioned it, I was more mad at myself. My vision had been getting worse over the last few years, but got even worse after surgery. I found Dr Shoemaker online. He has a protocol for the biotoxins created from the mold that women with bad implants experience, along with people who have contracted mold from other sources. There are few doctors who understand mold and how to get rid of it. I was frustrated with myself for not figuring it out and spending money that people donated to me over the years for removing the implants instead of cancer treatment, thinking that if I had, the cancer would have gone away with everything else I do. Since I’m still dealing with it, that may not have been the case, but all frustrations in my life have been great learning experiences.

I am being gentle with myself, but still pushing limits when I think I can get away with it. I called a friend who goes skiing at Steven’s Pass almost every week and asked if I could ride along. He and his girlfriend ski, but I was taking my snowshoes to get in an elevation workout. Many people have already scolded me for going snowshoeing by myself, so you don’t need to do it too. If any of them had gone with me, I wouldn’t have been by myself.  Besides, I was just taking the bridge across Highway 2 and snowshoeing up to Skyline lake.

I was wearing a fitness tracker that a friend gave me a few weeks ago. When I was huffing and puffing, needing to stop and breathe, I would check the fitness tracker to see what my heart rate was. Sometimes the heart picture ❤ just flashed. Every time I needed to stop and the heart rate did register it was over 170. One of my doctors told me to keep it below 150, to keep from getting sick from mold die off.  There were quite a few people, but few snowshoers. Most of the people going up had skins on their skis and would ski off the mountain.  Several had their dogs with them who chase them down, apparently without sinking in the snow.

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It’s March, so maybe it’s spring wonderland…and a view up my nose!

If you’ve been following me, you know that when I reach my hiking destination, I take a picture of my back without my shirt on, and a back double bicep pose.  If I’m with someone, they take the picture but if I’m by myself I use my gorilla pod to attach my camera to a tree or rock.  With so much snow at the lake, that wasn’t going to happen. As I approach the lake, there were fewer and fewer people.

I found a guy taking a picture of his wife or girlfriend, with the lake and peak in the background.  After talking to them for a couple of minutes, I asked. ” I know this is a crazy request, but would you mind taking a picture of my back without my shirt on? It’s a thing I do at the top of all my hikes.” He agreed.

It was a little awkward taking all of my upper layers off. I don’t care who I’m topless in front of, but his girl seemed uncomfortable. He took a few pictures. I thanked him and  commented again on how weird they probably thought I was.

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Thank you King County Deputy for taking the picture!

He said “No, it’s not a problem. I see naked bodies at work all the time.” I asked what do you do that you see naked people? He replied “I work for the King County sheriffs office.”

It  wasn’t until I was halfway down the mountain, that I realized, maybe it’s legal to be topless in public!

A giant thank you to the deputy who took my picture! Because I don’t know if it’s legal or not, I’m leaving the date of my trip out so I don’t get him in trouble!

Love, gratitude and blessings!

~Susan



Another World?
January 31, 2017, 7:52 pm
Filed under: ASEA, Breast implant illness, Wiener Friendly Soap

Saturday, I went to an ASEA meeting in Gig Harbor. GPS said 69 miles. I wasn’t sure if my car would go that far, but my friend had flown in from North Carolina, so I had to try. I did some of my cancer treatments in the morning before I left, but ran out of time and even forgot to take my supplements. I was asked to give my ASEA testimonial and realized when I was doing it that I was shaking. I hadn’t eaten enough. I love the way I feel on my diet, until my blood sugar starts to drop. At the break, I went out to my car and ate a few handfuls of nuts to hopefully prevent it from dropping more.For the most part, it worked. As I was leaving the meeting, I kept thinking I was forgetting something. I checked my bag, my wallet, phone, water bottle, coat…everything was there.

The road to get back to I-5, is a toll road. My options were to pay $6 or to drive north and take a ferry across the water for $8. I chose the toll road and felt like I had gone thru into another dimension as I crossed the Tacoma Narrows Bridge. I thought about the YouTube video I had seen about the collapse of the same bridge, they named “Galloping Gertie”, on November 7, 1940.

My imaginary friend took the pictures as I drove. On the picture with the bridge in front of me, Mount Rainier is off to the left in the distance. It seemed so much bigger than the picture shows. Immediately, I had thoughts of climbing it. Because of the mold toxicity from the implants, I don’t see it happening this year, but my intent is to stay on my supplements, diet and other protocol to eliminate the mold, biotoxin and silicone toxicity and get my cardio vascular system working the way it’s supposed to again! I now have “Summit Mount Rainier” on my goal list for next year.  There were strange looking clouds north of the mountain, that kind of looked like hot air balloons. Once I got onto I-5, the clouds appeared even larger. I have seen similar clouds that seem to sit on top of Rainier, almost like a hat, but never 2 of them, away from the mountain.

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I imagined they were cloaking devices for alien spaceships. What else was I going to think about. I’m driving a 95 4-Runner with the original parts. The cassette player quit working years ago and there’s a cd stuck in the cd player and won’t play either. Every radio station on my pre-sets was chatter or commercials. I should know better than to let my imagination go! Remember, what you think about, you bring about!

Before I got to Seattle, traffic was awful!  I decided to get off the freeway and take a back road adventure, not knowing exactly how to do it. I had a general idea and my internal gps works pretty well. My intention was to get to a bridge I’ve seen people taking sunset pictures from and to get another picture of Mount Rainier. As I arrived at the first stop light, I was in the left of a double turn lane. A gold 1978 Caprice Classic pulled up beside me. My mom drove one. The original color was tan. I don’t remember seeing sparkly gold ones back then.  The driver had giant bug eyes and kept jerking his head around, as if he was looking for someone who was after him.He had his phone in his hand. It appeared that not only was he terrified, but on some heavy duty drugs I’ve never been around.  I looked in my rear view mirror, then my side mirrors, first looking for a police car, then wondered if bullets would start flying. When I didn’t see anything, I wondered if there were dementors flying around that I couldn’t see. Maybe the grim reaper was after him. As soon as the light changed, he tried to go faster than the car in front of him. When it appeared he was going to try to fit his car between mine and the car in front of him, I slowed down and let him in.He was jerking his car all over, but managing to stay in his lane. I was so intent on not getting hit, I didn’t even think to get his plate. The next stop light was red. A couple and a little boy, about 4 years old on his bike, were about to go into the intersection. The man grabbed the seat of the bicycle as the bug eyed driver of the Caprice Classic swerved his way across the intersection, missing cars driving on the cross street. I was so thankful nobody got hit!  I decided to turn, so I wouldn’t be near him or whoever was after him. About 3 minutes later, I made it to the bridge I was trying to get to. I couldn’t park on the bridge, so turned to look for parking. There was a skinny guy wearing an orange construction vest over his clothes, dancing on the corner. As I turned, I looked at him. His skin was the color of hot chocolate with extra milk. His eyes were a really pale blue with almost no pupils showing.He was staring at me, so I waved as I turned. He kept dancing with his eyes following me. He reminded me of a vampire I saw on a movie. There weren’t any parking spots on that street, but I also didn’t really want to walk past him. I was still curious, wondering if he really looked like what I thought I saw, so I turned around and drove by again. I drove slow as I approached the corner. He stared at me. I  wasn’t scared, but he looked exactly like I saw before. Was he wearing contacts? I had never seen eyes like that.Where was I?

Once across the bridge, I found myself in Chinatown. There are street signs with our letters, but another language’s words. I parked and walked onto the bridge for my pictures.  I saw a heavyset guy on the other side of the street, carrying a Rastafarian colored blanket and what appeared to be brightly colored wooden toys he may have been selling. I stopped to take pictures about halfway across the bridge of the view on my side.

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Traffic on I-90 and I-5 sucked!  I knew I would find another way to go home. I took a picture of the stadiums, then looked around to stay aware of my surroundings. The Rasta guy was gone. I felt like I had only taken about 10 seconds to look at the traffic and take the picture. He wasn’t on the bridge and I didn’t see him on either side. More and more, I kept feeling like I was on another planet or some alternate reality. I turned around to see the Seattle skyline.

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After taking the picture, I saw movement down on the hill below. There were fences built last year around the area to keep the homeless people out of there, but I was seeing someone inside of a small shelter made with supports, a tarp, other stuff and a roof, but open on 2 sides. It reminded me of my friend I took in, back in 2008, who was homeless when I met him. It was about 45 degrees outside. I stopped taking pictures because it looked like he was looking at me and I didn’t want him to think I was taking pictures of him inside his “house”. I thought about how cold I would be if I stood still for any length of time. I looked again and wondered what he was wearing that was that color. I realized in a split second that he was naked. I don’t know if the show was for me, but I was quickly reminded of Glenda the 911 dispatcher who entered an animal control call when someone called in reporting a guy choking his chicken in public. I’ve never seen a man do it like that! His chicken looked like it was already dead, limp and lifeless, as he jerked it so fast and furious, I thought he was going to rip it off. Yes, by then I was staring. “Buddyyyyyyyyy, you’re gonna hurt yourself!’ I said, out loud. I had a jar of Wiener Friendly Lube in my pocket. I thought about throwing it to him, but didn’t want him to think I was throwing something at him, nor anyone else to think I was littering. I scanned the area, wondering if there was a break in the fence somewhere I could get closer to give it to him.

I remembered a 911 call I took years ago when the female caller was telling me her boyfriend, who had just beat her up, ran away naked. She explained that he gets hot when he’s high on meth and takes his clothes off. She also told me that he can’t get a hard on when he’s high on meth and that she keeps him around because he’s the best she’s ever had at going down on her.  I quickly realized I should stay away from the naked guy choking his chicken and started walking back to my car.

As I was almost off of the bridge, a couple was walking on the sidewalk toward me. They both had brightly colored hair. The guy had giant gauge piercings in his ears and his bottom lip. It looked like he should be in a tribal picture in national geographic, except as I got closer, he was also covered in tattoos. I said “hi” as I passed them and he started making grunting noises like he was a pig. Where was I?

The rest of the ride home was just driving in traffic with a pit stop to pee. At no point did I feel really scared or threatened, just weirded out. It took me 3 hours total to get home with my stops. It was by far, the weirdest hour I’ve had in a long, long time. I realized about 5 hours after I got home that what I was forgetting was that I was supposed to meet with a friend in Tacoma. I wonder if any of it would have happened if I had gone to see her. I wonder what kind of adventure I would’ve had on the ferry?! There are interesting things all around us if we just look!

Love, gratitude and blessings

~Susan



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It’s Christmas Eve. It would be mom and dad’s 56th wedding anniversary if dad hadn’t died 18 years ago. It would be an anniversary for me too, but all I want to say about that is don’t ever make big days on holidays! It has the potential of really f’ing up what could be a great holiday! It doesn’t bother me anymore, but for some people, that kind of crap can last a lifetime. On that, I’m at home, almost alone. I was going to go to “the Lighthouse” with the kids, but felt like I needed to get things done at home. They’re on their way home and I’ve accomplished very little of what I was going to do. I have however been busy doing what apparently needed to be done. Still tired from a workout on Tuesday and working long retail days, I decided to do a third coffee enema, in hopes it would give me the energy I needed to attack my chores. I fell asleep on the floor, with a quart of coffee hanging out in my colon. I’m thankful it mostly stayed there! To clarify “mostly”, it didn’t spill, but most of it got absorbed by my healthy, functioning colon. When I woke up, I had to pee so bad I nearly pee’d on the floor. I love how well certain parts of my body work!

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I came downstairs to get started on my chores and Lucy kept following me and laying down within inches of where I was standing. It took a few times of her doing that for me to realize she was hungry. So was I. I made one of our favorite cooked meals of fried onions, mushrooms, burger, avocado mayo and brussel sprouts. She skips the onions and mushrooms. As I ate, I thought about how tired I’ve been lately. On March 18, when I came out of explant surgery, I asked my doctor if they put vaseline in my eyes. She said they hadn’t.  My right eye was so blurry I couldn’t see out of it. Part of it got better over the next few days, but I’ve had a strip in my vision that’s been blurry ever since. I have floaters in both eyes. Since surgery, I’ve done many things to detox my body from the silicone toxicity, mold and biotoxins that are commonly found in women with breast implants. When I had my live blood cell analysis last year, it showed high levels of mold, but at that time, I had no idea it could be from the implants. A few months ago, I could’ve accidentally killed myself taking oregano oil to kill the mold without realizing it also drops blood sugar. I was thankful I knew enough to check my blood sugar before I went to bed. It had already dropped to 60. I’m also on week 6 of a 12 week parasite, yeast, fungus cleanse. It should be helping! I remembered a vision test that’s supposed to tell if there are deeper problems than just vision. I found it online and decided to take it.

It’s called a Visual Contrast Sensitivity Test. https://www.vcstest.com/test/

I did the calibration, getting out the measuring tape to make sure I did it right without cheating. I covered my right eye and started the test. WTF?!! The beginning few on each test were visible, but the last few, I couldn’t see the circle, much less the direction of the lines within it. I took my glasses off and leaned in to cheat. Nothing. No difference. I couldn’t see any contrast, the circle or the lines. I tried to convince myself the test was messing with me and would show at the end that there wasn’t contrast on them. I completed the left eye, then switched to the right. Same thing. No contrast on the last 3-4 of each section. How could I be doing everything I’m doing and still have biotoxins not only affecting my vision, but also my memory, thought processes and who knows what else?! I started crying before I got the results. Once I saw the charts and read through my results, I cried more. I kept crying to the point I could no longer see the computer screen.

The kids called and asked if we wanted to meet them. Lucy and I left and walked with the entire pack in the woods for over an hour. It’s 1:11 on Christmas Day. MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! It was one of the most exciting night hikes in a long time! Maybe I’ll tell you about that another time.

Apparently I just needed to cry. I know I’m not done yet. Every day, I pretend I’m healthier than I am. Every day, I allow others to think I’m healthier than I am. Everyone has cancer cells in their bodies, I just have a few who are as stubborn as I am and just refuse to die. Knowing that, eliminating ALL of the cancer probably won’t ever happen. Getting it down to a level where my healthy cells can help the stubborn ones transition makes more sense. It’s the same with the mold, the biotoxins and the silicone.  I know that our bodies make glutathione to detox crap out and ASEA increases glutathione levels 500-800%. I’ll keep doing what I do, drink more ASEA and just be happy. My ultimate goal is to be happy. The more things I can do to make myself happy, the happier all of my beautiful cells will be! The happier we are, the happier everything in and around us is too!

Do something to make yourself happy today and every day!

Love, gratitude and blessings!

Merry Christmas!

~Susan



Why did you lie to me? Why didn’t you tell me?

Why did you lie to me? Why didn’t you tell me? They aren’t always the same.  My ex husband would call me a liar for omitting what he considered to be important information. To him, withholding information was identical to lying. Learning what he thought was important vs what I thought was important was the miscommunication.

The last few weeks, I’ve been lonely, sad and confused, wondering why people who I thought I was close to had been lying to me. I mentioned it to my son, who quickly enlightened me. The last few weeks weren’t about being lied to, it was about opening my eyes and seeing the truth. A few quick checks when I originally felt the incongruency of the words I was being told vs the way it made me feel, would have revealed the truth months ago. Was I so lonely that I wanted to maintain those relationships even though I knew something was off?  A few quick phone calls and internet searches later… The FAA had no record of the husband who had been the pilot in a Beechcraft King Air plane crash with a fatality of a passenger. The police department had no premise records of arrests made at a specific address. Google images and Zillow revealed that the address wasn’t in a multi-million dollar gated community with a giant pool, but a small neighborhood of condominiums off of a busy road with a Walmart at the closest stop light and the nearest pool in a backyard of the next neighborhood over. County records revealed that the roommate I was told was an unattractive beer drinking buddy, turned out to be a wife. Friends asked to borrow money and showed me documentation, indicating when they were getting paid. That day is long gone. Even though it didn’t feel right, I didn’t want my  past money screwovers to make my current decisions.  I’ve often slipped, but try not to punish current people in my life for injustices of people in my past. When new people treat me in the same poor ways as people no longer in my life, I’ve noticed that I’m the common denominator. Funny how when I see problems, I’m always there! (Ho’oponopono)

Just kidding! I’m thankful for the truths you showed me!

When my first husband didn’t get the job we moved to Seattle for, he became a private investigator. I didn’t remember how much I enjoyed finding the truth. Well, finding the truth – the answers, to other people’s questions. Why did it hurt when I discovered the truth wasn’t what I thought it was from some of the important people in my life?

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Cameron and I were talking more about lying vs the truth. He reminded me those people are only being my mirrors. He asked me how I’m lying to myself. I told him I didn’t think I was. The conversation went on a tangent, talking about the trails we were hiking. Unknowingly to me, it cleverly went back.

“Mom, do you have cancer?”

“I don’t know.” Pretending I’m the healthy person I see myself being, but not totally honest by saying yes or no.

“Nailed it!” Cameron said.

“Nailed what?” I asked.

He went on to remind me that I do have cancer on the back of my neck, on my chest, on my left leg and possibly on the back of my head. Right now, the skin is intact, but I can still feel the lumps under the skin. We are working with energetic healing techniques for awhile before I black salve the areas again. Plus, as effective as it is, black salve hurts and I’m filling my time with things that feel good!

He asked me how I can let the go of the cancer if I won’t acknowledge its existence. You won’t change something that you don’t think is a problem.

Oh my! He’s been listening! All these years, I’ve been teaching him things and now he’s showing me the part of my mirror I was missing! He’s right! When things are working, we don’t normally change them. It’s when things no longer work that we want something better.

I do my daily treatments and continue eating my ketogenic diet, but I don’t think a lot about why I do it. Once in awhile, someone will ask about my scars and I tell them I have melanoma. It has become something I live with, not a life threatening disease. The looks on their faces tell me I should be more concerned. Sometimes, it scares me and I think about it too long, scaring myself more.

Because of current statistics, cancer is seen by many as a death sentence. Most people are devastated when they get the news that a loved one has cancer. Some patients don’t want the sadness from friends and loved ones, so they don’t tell anyone. I was considered “terminal” for over a year before I told my family. If I thought I sounded sick, I wouldn’t answer the phone and would call people back when I felt like I could fake it and sound good enough that they wouldn’t ask questions. My mom noticed I coughed a lot when we talked on the phone. It was such a normal thing, I denied I was coughing much. I tried to tune it out. Since even back then, I had stopped going to doctors, I don’t know if cancer made it to my lungs or not. Now, after learning about the mold that grows inside saline breast implants, the coughing could have been from mold toxicity.

When I finally told people I had been dealing with recurrent melanoma with liver and lymphatic system metastasis, they didn’t ask why I lied to them, they asked “Why didn’t you tell me?”

I talk to cancer patients who keep their diagnosis a secret, a lot. The “I” I’m about to speak of is only a percentage of cancer patients, but it is a common theme.

Especially around the holidays, I make excuses why I can’t spend time with family or friends like I used to. Too much going on at work, nobody to feed the fish or put compost in the worm bin. I do my best to only show up when I feel like I look good. I don’t want people to treat me like I’m dying. Sometimes, whether from the cancer or the treatments, my memory doesn’t quite work like it used to. I forget birthdays, anniversaries, doctor’s appointments, lunch dates,payment due dates. Things that are important to me. I feel like shit when I let you down. I tell myself I will try harder, but I forget again. You quit calling. Would you still be mad if you knew I was dying?  Would a forgotten birthday be remembered, along with your refusal to communicate, after I’m gone? Would you ask “why didn’t you tell me?”

Just because a friend or family member is being distant, doesn’t mean they have cancer or any other disease they don’t want to admit to. It does however mean, they may need your love now, more than ever.

Those who purposely lied to me. I’ll love them at a distance.

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Love, gratitude and blessings

~Susan



Lose Weight With ASEA

Lose Weight With ASEA

Today is the first day of my goal to compete again. 25 weeks until I’m on stage in a posing suit that takes about 6 inches of fabric to make. Even less, now that my breast implants live in plastic containers on the shelf and not in my chest. I haven’t competed since 2010. For years, I’ve said I would never compete again. Something shifted last week and apparently it’s time. This is my “before” picture with clothes.

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I haven’t decided if I want to share a picture with fewer clothes. I know we all want to see the real before/afters, but I’m not sure I want to see it on my phone, much less on the computer screen. Don’t get me wrong, I love my body!  I also know I’ll want to see photos when it’s in better shape! I guess it’s time to look in the mirror and remind myself that I completely love and accept myself, just the way I am. Funny how things reveal themselves when I least expect them to. Plus, I don’t like selfie pics with the camera and flash in the mirror. It makes me feel like I don’t have any friends who could take it for me.

I need to find my body fat calipers to find out where I’m at. Before getting pregnant, I competed at 130 pounds. While I was pregnant with Cameron, I took advantage of the crazy hormones and put on about 20 pounds of muscle. I gained 80 total, which was totally unnecessary, but back then, I gave in to juicy juice and tillamook sharp cheddar.  Over the years, I competed heavier. Once, I weighed in at 172. I only went to the show to support my husband at the time. On the way, we agreed to do mixed pairs to practice for another show that was coming up. Elaine, one of the promoters, talked me into competing in the open women’s division too, because there weren’t enough competitors. I ended up winning and feeling bad that I beat the woman who wanted so bad to win the weight class so she could go to nationals. I’ve been on both sides.

This morning, I got on the scale. I’ve never cared about my weight as long as I like the way I look naked.  Hmmmm…..
What weight will I compete at? How will I do cardio since I’m having difficulty breathing when I’m not doing anything strenuous? I treated the owie (undiagnosed melanoma because I’m stubborn and won’t go to my doctor) on  my chest again.  It feels like it has a web wrapped around my lungs that’s tightening at random times.

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I’ve never lost weight on my modified ketogenic diet. Maybe because sometimes around midnight, I check and my blood sugar is under 70. Not knowing how much it drops at night with so many possible variables, I eat, just in case.  I’ll put 6 eggs in the blender, then add 1/3 cup coconut oil, 1 can of coconut milk, 1T raw cacao, 6 drops of vanilla stevia and sunflower lecithin.I’ve never done the math, but it’s gotta be over 1,000 calories.Oh shit! I did the math and it’s over 2,000 calories. I don’t usually finish it, but still! No wonder I’m 180 pounds!  Or cinnamon nuts…or raw cacao mixed with raw almond butter and coconut oil. YUM!! Now that I have my goal, I will eat more plain coconut oil earlier in the evening and hopefully, that will keep my blood sugar stable.

I’ve used ASEA for the health benefits since I started last year. There’s so much I didn’t know it was capable of helping!  Today, my sponsor Lourene, posted this video on YouTube. It’s about ASEA and weight loss. What a perfect time for me to realize that!

It’s actually talking about fat loss, not just weight loss. Anti-aging, athletic performance/recovery, health and wellness and weight loss!  I am so thankful ASEA found me!

25 weeks. Join me on your own 25 week journey. Let’s do this! Follow along here or call to see if we are a coaching match. 425-347-1424 Pacific

Love, gratitude and blessings

~Susan

 



Loving Life!

I had my 3 month appointment with my plastic surgeon today. March 18, I had my almost 22 year old breast implants removed. I had no idea how big my pectoral muscles were until the implants were gone. At my pre-op appointment, she said my breasts were probably significantly bigger than before I got implants, because typically, women gain weight in their breasts in “middle age”. WTF? I’m going to live a healthy productive life until I’m at least 140 years old. I’m nowhere near middle age!  I told her I didn’t think they were bigger, but we would both find out after the surgery.

At today’s appointment, aside from my breasts, we discussed my pectoral muscles. It was hard to not flex when she was taking my “after” photos. She says they’re HUGE! They are big, but I haven’t dumbbell pressed 95 pound dumbbells since some time before I broke my back in 2007. I won a push up contest recently, but haven’t done chest presses at the gym for about a year. The ketogenic diet I’m on is supposed to maintain lean muscle mass, while also supplying needed nutrients. I am very happy with my new body!

She agreed with my statement that my breasts hadn’t grown in 22 years. “They are really small.”  I’m actually thankful they aren’t any bigger. Looking straight on in the mirror, it looks like I have some, but a side view, reveals my pecs are bigger than my boobs. There’s a big dent where my pecs end and before my breast tissue begins. She said the only way to “fix” the dent is to do a fat transfer. She also said she won’t do it because of the amount of cancer I’ve had. It’s all good. I’ve had women tell me they don’t want to explant because they’re afraid of what their boobs will look like after. I don’t care. I’m happy to be alive!

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What are you afraid of? What are you afraid to do?

How will you make your life the best story in the world?

I’m planning my next adventure. How wants to join me?

Love, gratitude and blessings

~Susan



Happy Father’s Day, Lake 22 and Cancer

My friend wanted to go hiking today, since both of our dads died 17 years ago and neither of us would be celebrating Father’s Day. George, the tumor on my chest (remember, we named him), went away and will be remembered by the scar tissue left behind. I’m working on it with my lotions, potions and magic (or prayer if that’s what you call it). Soon it will only be a memory.

This week, I’ve been having a lot of pain from a tumor on the bottom of my left foot, which felt like it was traveling up my leg. I’ve had both of them before, but for whatever reason, they must be afraid they’re going to miss out on something and have come back a few times. Last week I applied blood root black salve to both of them. The one on my foot reacted, but barely. I applied it again the next day. It definitely hurt more!  On Wednesday, the pain was so intense, I was pale and sweaty and didn’t know if I was going to puke or pass out. The pain was bearable without my shoes on, so I ended up standing and working 7 hours in my socks.  I’ve been making a concoction of DMSO, Magnesium oil and Lugol’s iodine and putting it on the recent scars several times daily. I also put it on the spot on my leg that didn’t react. It started burning immediately. Yesterday, I decided to reapply black salve. I felt it reacting – tingling,  as I was trying to go to sleep. I used Emotional Freedom Technique tapping and the pain resided within a couple minutes. I was just as lucky when I woke up this morning, except it looked awful!

Left Foot Owie

I decided I would try the hike. My friend knew about my explant surgery in March and the current cancer situation, but he was willing to go slow and wait for me or even turn around if I needed to. Both owies were bandaged and I was ready to spend the day in the forest, talking about our dads, the things we want to do with our lives, the qualities of the significant others we dream about…you know, the little things.

Lake 22 is on the Mountain Loop Highway in Granite Falls, WA. It’s one of the few hikes I haven’t done on Mtn Loop. The trail reports looked like it would be easy enough for me, in my current condition. It was 2.7 miles to the lake, another 1.1 miles around the lake and 2.7 back to the car. I figured if the pain got bad, I could turn around and wait at the car. Since the trail around the lake comes back to the same trail, I could’ve waited while he walked around. He disagreed with my ideas. He would have gone back with me if I needed to. That’s one of the qualities.

I didn’t feel either owie. Once we got to the lake, we stopped on the bridge to take pictures. Immediately, both owies started throbbing. We started moving again and headed around the lake. As long as I kept going, I didn’t feel them. As soon as we started going back, I realized that going downhill escalated the pain. It sucked, but the smells, the trees, the birds, the cute little mountain rodents, the waterfalls and navigating the rocks, creeks and tree roots lining the trail, kept me distracted. The pain and swelling seem to still be increasing since we finished the hike. It was my first hike since October. I’m feeling it now. I am so excited I accomplished it!

I am so happy and grateful I was able to hike 6.5 miles, only having to stop to breathe once and I’m still awake, sharing my adventure with you! I hurt all over, but it was worth it!

 

 

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I am so happy and grateful I was able to hike 6.5 miles, only having to stop to breathe once and I’m still awake, sharing my adventure with you! I hurt all over, but it was worth it!

Love, gratitude and blessings

~Susan